French People Are Not Rude!

I have for years heard complaints from Americans and other Europeans alike about how rude French people are. I had until recently bought into this idea myself that this was in fact true. I went to Paris in 1993 and experienced the Parisians to be rather distant and cold. However, I also went there this past June and this time the trip changed my attitudes as to how I view French people quite a bit. During my last trip I spent time in Prague, Haugesund (which is a small town in Norway) and Paris. I didn’t find the people in Prague to be particularly service-oriented and helpful. I have a feeling that the old communist ways are still influencing to a great degree the people of the Czech Republic. They have still a long way to catch up to American service and friendliness before I will consider visiting that country again. But that is another story. Before I went to Paris this time, I brushed up on a few common phrases that I had read one should always use when addressing a French person. The guidebook said to always start a conversation or question with “Bonjour,” Bonsoir,” “Bonne Nuit,” and the like. This is how French people always greet each other and French people will expect to hear these phrases back when encountering another person whether is it someone they already know or a complete stranger.  In addition, French people always address each other with the phrases “Monsieur,” ” Madame,” and “Mademoiselle.” By using these phrases in every greeting or at the beginning of every conversation, the book promised that everything would just go much smoother while in France. Indeed it did. This is the grease that every French person is using every day in their inter-personal interactions. By making an effort to use these same phrases myself, however bad my French is and it just sounds like gurgles when coming from me, it greatly improved how well I was treated while in Paris. When I added “Merci,” “Oui” and “No” I received even better service. I used perhaps a total of 10 phrases while staying there in June, and I cannot emphasize strongly enough how much better I got along with the French than 4 years prior. If I had been able to, I would have used even more French words, but I’m not that smart, and after carefully having studied my guidebook for the exact phrase I wanted to say, I could usually only remember one or two words. I think that most French people do not feel confident in speaking English and that this is the reason they prefer to speak French to a tourist. I do not think that we should ever expect while visiting a foreign country for the natives of that country to communicate to us in any language other than their own. If this is the attitude we all take with us when we travel abroad, I think we will be pleasantly surprised when someone actually does speak to us in English. I received quite a bit of help from French people on my trip when I had difficulty, and I believe I greatly enhanced my chances of getting assistance because I tried to speak a few words in French and I did not expect anybody to speak English to me. Remember, I only know ten words or less in French. That is all it took.  

U.R. Rong